Thursday, June 01, 2006
testies

Testies!

Posted at 12:20 am by Michael
Comments (2)  

Tuesday, May 16, 2006
Bold Levels Of Truthiness

Oh, Michael Savage, will you ever stop? Or, like, use your damned brain for three seconds? Man, this guy has no idea what's going on.

Will our brown brethren, who are so nationalistic and so anti-gringo and anti-Anglo, be as enlightened as the European-American is? I don't think so. Do you?

Well, I'm sure glad I'm white and Anglo-Saxon. Because clearly, we are an enlightened and uplifted race, who would never judge anyone's intellectual or emotive capacities by, say, the color of their skin. Or their sexuality. Or their physical beauty.


Posted at 11:23 am by Saladin
Comments (2)  

Thursday, May 04, 2006
Brilliant Future 001

 Blogdrive I-Wear Entry Editor
Blogdrive WYSIWYG Entry Editor v. 3.57b


Welcome to the future.

MONROVIA, CA -- Blogdrive's Executive Vice President of Emerging Global Technology Acquistions division announced the launch of the 3.57b entry editor on the video conferencing multiscreen to the cheers of thousands of swag-wearing Blogdrivers at the Malaysian BlogCon2012 conference this evening.  BlogCon Malaysia attendance has surpassed the Tokyo Auto Show in recent years.

After the Blogdrive acquistion of the Tawian-based Neural Network start-up, Hudyang, many blog pundits forecast the emergence of neural editors.  Blogdrive has shocked financial market pundits with the 3.57b because it is the first low cost and functional product to truly work in the long-awaited I-wear market.

The 3.57b has not only been crowned product zero in the I-wear market by EEEI, but also its software has been rumored to be up for multiple awards for idiot-proofing among social networking and marketing industry groups.  Blogdrive's own logo serves as the 3-button comand interface.

When one of the 121.3 million Blogdrivers is using the the 3.57b editor, they can compose in the language of their choice, preview and verify their entry on the heads-up display, and then simply process that entry with one touch on the Blogdrive logo.  Tapping the orange control means cancel, blue saves draft, and green publishes the entry.

Blogdrive's Emerging Global Technologies division is currently working on the automatic classification of blog entries using the Neural Emoticon System Generator, but the roll-out of the NESG Blogdrive feature has been hampered by the recent inclusion of the bi-polar algorythm.



Posted at 06:46 pm by John Furie Zacharias
Comments (10)  

Tuesday, April 18, 2006
Cigarettes and a tan

I'll probably always think of her most in the spring. Perfect shape, beautiful eyes, perfect smile. Funny laugh. She was a neighbor. We shared cigarettes on a balcony together. We laughed a lot and spoke of silly things. Soon we shared more than just cigarettes. She was always a pleasure. Never played games. Never expected anything and lived strongly in the moment. (And always very clean I might add). She looked just like Betty Page, if Betty Page were a blond with long legs and a tan.

She died in the spring. Drugs. Ain't it just the way? Now I think of her often. Mostly in spring. Among my thoughts of her is juan that I wish didn't always come to mind, but I can't keep it out of my head. I hope she's not offended. I picture her and think, "I used to hit that."


P.S. Hope ya'll had a happy Easter!


Posted at 01:07 am by Michael
Comments (5)  

Friday, April 14, 2006
Post-Katrina New Orleans Stupidity

 Flushing New Orleans


Just in time for the start of the 2006 hurricane season, the Bush administration finally came out with rebuilding guidelines for New Orleans homeowners that will qualify their homes for federal flood insurance.  According to the Washington Post, many homes will have to be elevated by at least three feet to qualify for insurance, a pre-requisite to rebuilding.  Raising a house one foot costs about $50,000 minimum.  Many homes are just not worth it.

Page two of the WaPo article reports something even more stupendously dumb concerning the flood insurance guidelines for the lower Plaquemines Parish with a pre-Katrina population of about 15,000 residents:

"Lacking such protection would make it extremely difficult to rebuild in the area -- new buildings may be required to be elevated as high as 35 feet to meet flood insurance requirements, officials have said -- and many believe it could lead to its virtual abandonment."

I added the bold emphasis to that quote to allow you to take an additional second to look back at the quote and re-read it.  Go ahead, I'll wait right here for you.

When WaPo staff writers Peter Whoriskey and Spencer S. Hsu suggest that, "many believe it could lead to its virtual abandonment," do you think they were standing in the humid Louisiana bayou country imagining a sheet metal roofed and stucco walled home atop a set of pillars as tall as the ones used for the Acropolis?

Craving more dumb?  Okay, I have more.  In typical Bush administration logic -- the levees are still not repaired from last year yet -- but go ahead and move back home.  "Oh, we're working hard on this problem," says Bushworld.  The levees will not even offer the same non-protection as they did last year until June.

Do take heart.  By 2010, the levees should be up to federal flood insurance guidelines, if the Democrusader's rubber stamp Congress can invest a few billion dollars on it now.

As long as you build a four-story tall tree house, you'll be safe from the hurricane's flooding storm surge, but the geniuses in the Bush administration that gave us Iraq as the 51st state probably forgot that a 35-foot-tall house might blow away from the winds of any hurricane.  Doh!

 


Posted at 01:41 pm by John Furie Zacharias
Comments (2)  

Monday, April 03, 2006
The Sovereignty Sidestep

South Dakota's recent passing of legislation designed to pretty much completely outlaw abortion ruffled more than a few feathers and only served to fuel the ongoing national debate on the topic. It turns out that Cecelia Fire Thunder, president of the Oglala Sioux Tribe, has decided to take action on the topic, using tribal sovereignty as the basis for an argument to allow for the establishment of an abortion clinic if the anti-abortion legislation comes into effect.

Posted at 01:23 am by Saladin
Comments (3)  

Friday, March 31, 2006
One day is not enough

 Wendys Chili Finger 
 Tipster To Get 
 $100,000 
Reward

Tomorrow is "April Fool's day."  Much like St. Valentine's day that has been co-opted by commercialism, April 1st has devolved in importance. Nowadays, it's like having everyone learn from the Discovery CaTV channel that desert rattlesnake actually tastes like chicken McNuggets instead of killing your own snake, like St. Patrick.  We must preserve the sanctity of April Fool's day.

First of all -- in order for any snake species to taste like roasted chicken -- not only do you need a Ronco Rattle Snake Grill (tm) with upside-down and reverse technical manual instructions in a number of olfactory languages, like Ranch and Bleu dressing, but also a hot stone transcribed in Aztec heiroglyphs explaining in pre-historic terminology that a minotaur was not the mythological example or genetic precursor of a basket of Buffalo Wings at Hooters.

Meanwhile, upstate NY is also known for whine and vinegar.  Perhaps Hillary Clinton is Balsamic.  I wondered how she might weigh in on the immigration issue.  I'm thinking ... hide and not comment.  That's so all-american -- hide and not comment -- as it is not about the definition of is, dammit.  No matter what a politician says about the immigration issue though, they're going to make someone angry.  Same difference.  Just do it.

If you're like Jessica Simpson ... 'Buffalo Wings,' 'Chicken of the Sea' and 'Hearts and Minds' do make people crazy.   It is as frustrated as bribing the tooth fairy.  But, why not build shoe factories in Indonesia with some of hundreds of millions of those Tsunami charity dollars?  Homeless people need good shoes.

Why not just make food, itself, cheaper?  Oil-rich countries should send food for Tsunami victims in converted oil tankers filled with wheat, and gas should be 42 cents per gallon in Jakarta, Bande Ache, and New Orleans.  Iraq has just become an economic development zone for large corporations with some pesky lead acne.

When George Bush says, "Iraq is central to the Global War on Terror," does he really mean that Iraq is the new Al-Qaeda Disneyland?  I know coalition forces travel in high-speed convoys just waiting for the surprise of an explosion.  Perhaps we should just build a few cool rollercoasters in Baghdad and call it a theme park.

Why not just make more water safer to drink for more people?  Someone could figure out a way to tow the Ross B-15 Iceberg and park it off the coast of Africa.

<shaman> No matter what your passion, getting off your apathetic ass and doing anything positive is going to work to improve your feeling of well-being toward yourself and everyone else.</shaman>

So, it's the thought that counts ... on April Fool's Day, too.  So, go think up some foolish idea.  As long as you don't harm yourself or someone else, go do something foolish on April Fool's Day.  Put on a funny hat and then go cut your neighbor's lawn, or sweep his sidewalk, or wash his car.

 


Sunday, March 12, 2006
Man that kid is ugly!

Doing some research, I visited myspace.com. *In my best Betty Davis voice* What a dump. More advertising then what was sufferable, popups and spyware offers galore. Sweeet! Several key areas had been down for several days, and after visiting their forum it seemed no juan was bothered by this. What luck!
I tripped over to the fairly new video section of the site which seemed to be filled with small clips of home-made videos. I clicked on "Top Videos". These included a guy holding down a friend, beginning to put his penis in his friend's face then deciding to instead spit on him, and then kick him in the ding ding. That was awesome! There was also a video of two black men fighting bare fisted in some backyard. Two thumbs up! There were lots of gross videos to be had. The best part about these videos is that you don't need the volume up at all, so you can still keep your ipod, cell phone or whatever else still attached firmly to your noggin' while viewing!

At times this world is so very ugly. (Why are there people like Frank?) Is myspace a reflection of what this world wants? Is it just the uneducated? How many are there? Are we allowed to kill them?
It seems that Cingular, Vivendi Universal and Disney have embraced myspace as a home for their advertising. Maybe after a fight video they could end it with an insert reading, "Brought to you by Disney; the happiest company on the Internet".

I'm sure that Rupert Murdoch and his News Corp. (NWS), Geoffrey Yang, partner with Redpoint and the other investors enjoy all that can be had at myspace, and are probably very proud of this dark child. After all, they're just some nice guys trying to make an honest buck.

There will be more to come. More myspaces, more nudity, more violence and plain old-fashion gore to be sure. They want sex and gore and they want it now!
The web will expose without prejudice the darker nature of what is human.

Can any of this be stopped? As my friend Rod Underhill (co-founder MP3.com) used to say to me time and time again when file sharing programs were becoming all the rage, "It's too late to stop it. The genie is out of the bottle, and the bottle is broken".

No, it will get uglier as people get uglier. The spammers will laugh the hardest.

When I was a boy I loved watching "The Little House on the Prairie". I loved Caroline Ingalls. I don't watch TV much anymore.

Video may appear at Blogdrive soon. I will try to help keep the black guys pummeling each other excluded.

 

 

The views expressed in this entry are that of its publisher and do not represent those of Blogdrive.com or NeverX, LLC. Thank you and have a nice day.


Posted at 03:22 am by Michael
Comments (11)  

Monday, March 06, 2006
Testies3

Testies 3

Posted at 05:48 pm by Michael
Comments (4)  

Monday, February 27, 2006
Prognosis Republican

In an attempt to illustrate the absurdity of the anti-homosexual legislation which seems to be a hot, throbbing, pulsating, veinous, blood-engorged undercurrent (possibly you thought I was going to go in another direction with that. If so, you were wrong. This time.) of the modern American political scene, Robert Hagan of the Ohio Senate introduced legislation to bar Republicans from adopting children.

Reading the article will grant power and wisdom beyond your wildest dreams! It is guaranteed!

(N.B. Guarantee invalid if your wildest dreams involving having more power and wisdom than you possess upon finishing the article.)


Posted at 10:11 am by Saladin
Comment (1)  

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